Bi-Lateral mastectomy's

I do not have breast cancer but have helped my mother battle it twice and nursed her through her mastectomies. At no point did I ever view her as less than feminine, less than beautiful or less womanly that I always and still do think that she is. That being said, I did think if that was my circumstance, I would not feel the same way about myself. I do think I would, I would feel a loss femininity. Partly because of myself, partly because my husband puts so much emphances on my breasts and how much he LOVES them- it would be a hard thing to accept. I think it's normal to question how/ if/ why/ what... when faced with difficulties in life. You seem like a strong woman coming through this twice now and I wish you the best. Marie

Hey you, you made a good decision. I will be your supporter, if you don't mind. I have worked for a breast surgeon for 19 years. 10 years ago 1 person said bilateral mastectomies, today it is like 4 out of 10. The breast tissue was not your friend and I know that you can do this. Some have reconstruction, it is half and half, as reconstruction has a great cost and many surgeries. So , if you can, at least, get the prosthesis, make it the best you can, when you are out and about. Anyone who gets to know you will know you are not a breast and love and care for you anyway. I pray you find some peace in knowing you did a good thing, To carry on is hard, you can do it You are still who you were before surgery.

I just wanted to let you know that you are not a freak! I do understand how you feel to some degree. I had two operations in April 2010 at age 41. I have numerous scars and depending on clothing it still bothers me. I am grateful that you are still here and I will keep you in my prayers!.

Trollian, my mother also had a double mastectomy last year, and accepting her scars has also been a struggle for her. Your feelings of inadequacy are completely normal, and you're not alone. But it's important to remember that breasts are not what make you feminine! There is so much else, your smile, your laugh. I know my mother was really big on going to support groups, and also reading advice books and sites like http://onlineceucredit.com/edu/social-work-ceus-can. You are beautiful! Don't forget it.

Trollian, I feel your pain. I too had a bilateral mastectomy 8 years ago and did not get reconstruction. I was in my 40's and thought my marriage was secure. He could not handle the cancer and decided to move on. I too feel like I'm an "IT". It is hard to find people/guys who can accept you for who you are.

It's not our physical appearance that makes us who we are but who we are on the inside. Hang in there! I'm here for you and with you.